I don't think you'll fit in the baby wipes.

As a mother, you can imagine that you will find yourself saying things you wouldn't normally say otherwise. Don't throw the ball in the house. Inside voices please. Don't hit your brother. Finish your vegetables. You get the idea.

Now I find myself saying all these things, and more. You never think about those other phrases that would pass your lips when speaking to your children. Those things you say, "I never thought I'd say that" or " Never thought I would use those words in the same sentence" to. I've decided to list some of these utterances, out of context of course, because it's funnier that way.

Things I Never Thought I Would Say To Another Human Being Until I Had Kids:

Shoes are not for eating!

Oh ew, no, oh please don't play in that.

Its ok honey, your brother has his OWN teeth.

I'm not sure, maybe coffee...or poop.

It says 'gdbvethlsmrcuqo'.

Is that poo on your undies or Nutella? It better be Nutella.

Please don't wipe your mouth off on your socks.

Because I don't WANT to sit in your fart tent.

You cannot pee in every bottle you find.

Where did your pants/shirt/socks/underwear go?

God definitely does like kitties.

Don't hang from there.

Yea but you don't really have laser eyes.

Sponges don't live in pineapples for real.

If you plant a kickball you will have a dirty kickball not a kickball tree.

Yes that is a very cool robot.

Please don't call your hat sexy. That's a grown up word.

No you're right, you cannot wash your brain.

Oh what beautiful green hair.

Sure I'll play ghostbusters, I'll be Egon.

Of course everyday I surprise myself with things I thought I'd never say. Be on the lookout for future posts like this.
Later Sweeties!
Peace and Pineapples